Ian Will Miss the Zombie Squirrels Holocaust

I took the elevator this evening with a nice old lady who lives on the 15th floor. I smiled at her and she asked me if I was the man she had talked to recently, the one who was moving out.

Oh dear... someone just confused me with iejw! I can't decide if I should take that as a compliment or an insult. ;-)

And I'm convinced Iejw and I will never meet in real life. It just seems like Fate wants it that way. He'll move out at the end of this month to some fancy gated community and I'm sure he'll stir clear of the tower block for the rest of his life. I also understand that this old lady wasn't the only one accosted by him on the elevator and told of his imminent escape from the tower block. The other day Kevin asked me if my "LJ friend" lived on the 10th floor; he'd taken the elevator with a guy who told him he had lived two years in the tower block and was now so very glad to be moving out.

***

I've been walking home most evenings after work, when the weather permits. My route takes me through Victoria Park and, as the days get darker earlier and earlier so do the paths in the park grow emptier of people. Two days ago, I found myself walking alone down a narrow path surrounded by trees which I shall call from now on "Squirrel Death Trap Path".

Nothing seemed wrong with this path at first glance. Sure, it was getting dark and there was nobody about, the trees bristled in the cooling breeze as if trying to warn me to stay away, but I was too immersed in my iPod to pay serious attention. I noticed movement from the corner of my eyes and caught two squirrels skipping towards me. They stopped a few feet away, stood on their back legs and rubbed their front paws together while showing me their cute teeth.

Aww, look, I thought to myself, they are hungry; they think I've got some treats for them. Aww, now there's two more hopping this way and also rubbing their front paws. Better get going; don't have anything to give to them and, in any case, don't want to be hanging out in this dark, narrow, path where nobody can see me and, jeez, isn't it getting so late, oh look there's one in the path up ahead, right in the middle of the path, and there are some perched on the foot-high fences bordering the path, and aren't those ones climing down the trees and hopping this way so cute? Better look back and see if anyone else is witnessing this. Oh. There are squirrels following me. There are three of them skipping down the path REALLY FAST towards me.

I may have speed walked undignifiedly out of Victoria Park.